Tag Archive | stress

Let go of that which you have no control over

I’ve come across this profound advise by the great scholar Ibn Al Qayyim. So many times in life, we stress and depress ourselves over that which we have little or no control over. What seems like such a simple thing to do, is sometimes the hardest….Leaving it in the hands of the Almighty.

sujood2.jpg

❝A friend will not (literally) share your struggles, an a loved one cannot physically take away your pain, and a close one will not stay up the night on your behalf…So look after yourself, protect it, nurture it…and don’t give life’s events more than what they are really worth…Be certain that when you break no one will heal you except you, and when you are defeated no one will give you victory except your determination…your ability to stand up again and carry on is your responsibility…Do not look for your self worth in the eyes of people; look for your worth from within your conscious…if your conscious is at peace then you will ascend high…and if you truly know yourself then what is said about you won’t harm you.

Do not carry the worries of this life… because this is for Allah…and do not carry the worries of sustenance because it is from Allah…and do not carry the anxiety for the future because it is in the Hands of Allah…

Carry one thing: How to please Allah. Because if you please Him, He Pleases you, fulfills you and enriches you. Do not weep from a life that made your heart weep…just say “Oh Allah…compensate me with good in this life and the hereafter”.

Sadness departs with a sajdah…happiness comes with a sincere du’a…Allah does not forget the good you do…nor does He forget the good you did to others and the pain you relieved them from…Nor will He forget the eye which was about to cry but you made it laugh…

Live your life with this principle: Be good even if you don’t receive good…not because of other’s sake but because Allah loves the good doers.❞ Ibn Al Qayyim

I Heart Change

Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.” — John F. Kennedy

 
Here’s the reality of it; you can love change  or hate it, fight it or embrace it, it’s going to happen with or without your approval.
Simply put, change is the “process of becoming different” it can be in the form of a new baby, changing careers, moving to a new city, the loss of a loved one, just to name a few. Be it positive or negative, there will always be the sense of unknown.

 
It’s been said that the only constant in our world today is change! Most of us resist it, because we are comfortable and secure in our world as we know it. And yet, if change is an inevitable reality of life (and it is), then we’d better be prepared to respond when the unexpected comes knocking on our door.

 
Not every person has the same tolerance to risk. Some adventurous souls actually relish the adventure of new situations. Others like their life exactly as it is: nice and predictable. For these people, the idea of change produces fear.

I recall having a conversation with an acquaintance about a month before I married my soul mate, Mr. M (that’s what I’ll refer hubby to on my blog). He heard I was getting married the following month after dating Mr. M for just nine months! (Yip nine months) And he said to me, (words I’ll never forget) “You never miss an opportunity, do you?” And I looked at him and said, “No, I don’t, and I am not afraid of change!” But after growing up in a small town, getting married would mean having to move to Jo’burg, (Mr. M’s hometown) 180km from home! It was exciting, but at the same time scary, would I find a job? Would I make new friends? And it was then I realized that I heart change! It keeps me alive, fueled, and ready for anything and everything!

From past experiences involving change, this is what I’ve observed;
It always seems bigger than it really is. We’re human, (and worse women!) We tend to over-think, over-analyze, and almost always expect the worse, and once we’ve passed the particular “stage” we look back and say “Oh? That wasn’t as bad as I thought”. Best way to deal with it; take it one day at a time, step by step

 
Change creates unwanted stress. That’s a known fact. And no two people deals with stress the same way. So now you not only have to deal with this “change” but also the stress that comes with it. If you’re in a marriage or relationship, you need to understand one another’s stress reactions and this will enable you to work together more effectively. Times of intense pressure can either pull you together or push you apart. Stress will come, and you need to ensure that it does not divide and conquer.

 
Life doesn’t always follow the plan that you may have had laid out for yourself. However, opportunities often present themselves in unexpected ways—learn to recognize and take advantage of these opportunities even if they were not part of your initial plan.

Focus is the next principle on dealing with change. When a transition in your life occurs, be sure to keep your thoughts on what you can control. Certain aspects of your life may operate outside of your control.
You have the opportunity to choose a perspective about change; is it overwhelming and stressful, or exciting and fun?

 
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Reinhold Niebuhr

images: Google.com