Archive | October 2014

Why I can’t celebrate Malala’s Nobel Peace Prize.

middle east revised

The Nobel Peace Prize was awarded this Friday to India’s Kailash Satyarthi and Pakistan’s Malala Yousafzai for their struggles against the suppression of children and for young people’s rights, including the right to education. That is great news, and it might almost mean Nobel Peace Prize makes sense again, after being awarded to Barack Obama in 2009 “for his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples”, and to European Union in 2012 “for over six decades contributed to the advancement of peace and reconciliation, democracy and human rights in Europe”.

Still, there is something that really troubles me. How come we (meaning the West) always recognize the “devils” of the East, the torments children like Malala had to and have to go through (in her case, with the Taliban), but always fail to recognize our own participation in creating those “devils”? How come we never…

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Becoming a Future Ex Smoker – My Personal Jihad

I could NEVER stop smoking! It’s the only thing that keeps me sane! I would kill someone if I don’t have a cigarette right now! I can’t do it.


Day 3

So it’s been 3 days since I’ve decided to quit the cancer sticks. My reasons for wanting to quit is another post on its own, which I will post very soon. For now, I want to share how this experience has become my personal jihad (struggle).

Until Friday 26th September, I used to smoke up to 15 cigarettes a day. First thing in the morning, last thing at night, every hour during work, first thing when getting into the car, after every meal. A cigarette fitted so perfectly between my index and middle fingers and into my every day life, that not having it there, would just not feel right.

And it doesn’t feel right. Over the past 3 days, I found that I would have to make changes to my daily routine in order to accommodate for the missing cigarette. It’s little changes, and it proves to be working…..so far. So, where I would normally wake up and go to the living area to smoke, I go directly to the bathroom, avoiding to leave the bedroom for a little while longer. (Smoking was never allowed in the bedroom, kitchen and bathroom, MY RULES).

After facing that demon, then comes the coffee…It’s like coffee and a cigarette were made for each other, it’s like Bonnie and Clyde, pms and chocolate, sushi and wasabi, pizza and cheese, nachos and guacomole……and this list can go on and on, which brings me to the next demon……

The cravings

And not just nicotine cravings. I feel the need to keep my mouth occupied almost all the time. I’ve eaten more sweets over the past 2 days, than I would over 6 months. My body will seriously go into sugar overload mode! So today, I’ve decided to take the fruit approach (I do not want to add to the weight that I might put on, but secretly hoping that I don’t). Anyway, back to the coffee demon, since I wandered off into the land of food. I now have my coffee in the kitchen, while preparing the lunch packs. That way, I’m not sitting down and having my coffee.

Dealing with the tiredness….

I sleep. I sleep way earlier now. I’m not sure if I am tired due to the absence of smoking, or if I’m subconsciously avoiding watching tv in the living room, as I associate that with smoking too? Nevertheless, I sleep early.

The challenge

This weekend is going to be a tough one. It’s Eid ul Adha, and we will be spending it with my family. Besides my younger sister, everyone smokes. If I can make it through this weekend with no relapses, then I’m stronger than I ever believed.